suddenly looked back at 2008 national day's activity photos of kdenn in childcare... memories, memories, memories... compared to now... he's growing real fast... picking up words, habits, good and bad, imitating adults, commenting actions and exploring curiosity here and there.
Remembered when i was admitted to hospital in january 2009, he will look for me (i wan mama) after the 2nd night he din see me for. Can sense the power of mummy's importance and the bond. No matter how fierce and mean i can treat him, no matter how playful the daddy can be close to, he will still find me. He got fever after missing me too much at the 3rd night... and finally saw me receiving him at the Childcare the next day, can see the gladness in his face.
Thinking of the change that is going to happen in 2 wks time... i can't imagine how he is going to take it or look at it. His little sister is coming soon. There will be someone calling him brother in a few years time. Eliza is going to fight with him for things. Will he lead? Will he be proud? Will he fight? many thoughts went through my mind. How will Eliza relate him as? How will both occur together as siblings? How will Kdenn change from there?
No matter what, i know for sure one thing: I love Kdenn very much, fully, truly, mostly, no less than i am going to continue loving Eliza for, no matter how much Eliza is goin to need me for the first few important years, i know Kdenn is still as important to me. I m proud to be his mother. And i m glad that mum is somebody i can rely on to keep him going while i build up my health after delivery again.
